he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
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