What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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