help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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