Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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