Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
