I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
