So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
