Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Randomize
