Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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