My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
