He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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