what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
