It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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