Well douche your snatch and let's go!
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
