i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize