does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
