I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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