Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
