Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
ttyl tear gas
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize