Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I will pee on everything he values.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
