Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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