Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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