why didn't you poke me back
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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