If i come over, it means nothing
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
