I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Bring me that man meat
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
