Your tits are I can't wait for
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
