I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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