Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Randomize