I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
