Please, let me fuck your mom
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
