She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
