dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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