I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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