Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just cut my nipple shaving
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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