Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
