I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
You dont lie about slip and slides
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
