Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
