just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize