kristin has been a bad kristin
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize