You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
