I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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