you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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