margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
