I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
4 words: hood of his car
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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