ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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