I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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