My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Blow job season was short but glorious.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize