Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
You are a genius and a whore.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize