Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize