I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
